Table of Contents
Introduction
I’m not a dog and my name is not Chewy. I’d like to think that those are two facts you already knew, but since you keep calling me by that name—and since it’s starting to make me feel uncomfortable—I thought I’d spell out the situation for you.
No, it’s not my name.
You might be thinking, “But Chewy! He looks like a dog!”
I have to tell you, though: I do not look like a dog. You see, I have brown hair and eyes. My fur is black, which is different from the white fur of your typical canine companion. You know what else? I am human and can communicate with you in language that isn’t just barking or whining at everything that happens around me (as many dogs are so prone to do).
My name is not “Chewy.” It’s Jeremy. And if you want some more proof that I’m not actually named after a beloved animated character from Star Wars, consider this: The two characters we’re talking about here are named Chewbacca and Han Solo—I don’t think anyone would try to pretend they were twins because they’re both humans who happen to wear brown pants all the time.”
It’s offensive.
- ) Don’t use someone’s name if they don’t want you to.
- ) Names are important to people, so please be respectful of them—don’t call your dog “Dora” if they hate it, or call your co-worker “jenny” when her name is actually Jenny (and she doesn’t want you calling her “jenny”).
- ) Don’t use names that might be considered inappropriate for certain people (like teacher or student). It’s a good idea not to refer to other people as their title all the time, especially if there are other names involved. For example: If I’m talking about my boss at work and what he did yesterday in front of his wife who I know him as Mr Smith but everyone else calls him John then it’s probably best not too say “John did this…” unless there’s another person around who knows both names and could help out with clarification if need be!
- ) You should only use a person’s real name if you know it and have permission from them personally first! There are exceptions but usually this rule applies
I did not give you permission to call me that.
The first step to getting a nickname is asking for it. If you’re not sure what someone’s name is, ask! It’s a basic rule of etiquette: if you’re going to call someone by a nickname, be sure that they’ve given their permission first.
If you don’t know the person’s name or can’t remember it (for example, if they just started at your workplace), then it’s time to do some detective work. A good way to approach this is by simply asking them how they’d like their name pronounced–and then telling them how many syllables there are in their real one so that they can adjust accordingly.
Just because some people with autism don’t mind you calling them by their dog’s name.
Everyone is entitled to their own name and to be addressed by it. This is especially true of people who might have difficulties with language and understanding, such as those with autism spectrum disorder (ASD). If you don’t know someone very well, it can be better to err on the side of caution when addressing them. Don’t just call someone by a name they don’t like because you think it’s funny or appropriate—ask first! You may find that some people with autism don’t mind being referred to by their dog’s name (which I’ll get into later), but if in doubt about whether this person would prefer another nickname, use it instead.
It’s better to call someone by the name they tell you, because names are important to people.
Names are important to people. When you call someone by their name, it tells them that you know who they are, and that you care about who they are. If you don’t know a person’s name, then how can you really know them?
You may be thinking: “But Chewy isn’t even my real name! It’s just what my mom called me when I was born.” True—but instead of using your “mom-given” nickname as an opportunity to invent a new one (like “Chewy”), try calling yourself something else instead. You might choose something that describes your personality or looks—and even if no one else uses it at first, eventually it will become yours anyway!
Conclusion
I hope this helps you understand why it’s so important to use the names that people give us. I know it can be hard to remember, but with some practice, it will become second nature.